Sunday, February 12, 2017

Are Daddy/Daughter Dances Bad?

So I took my 10-year-old to a Daddy/Daughter dance at my church last night. That's admirable, right?

Or was it?

I recently spoke to someone who had a different perspective on this--and I can't get my mind off it.

She said, "I remember going to one of those. But it was specifically for teenage girls in high school. I looked forward to it for years as a right of passage, per se."

Apparently, it was meant for training--a time for a dad to teach his girl what to expect during a real date and to train her what to look for in a boy's behavior. Or what to watch out for.

"This whole idea of letting little girls experience things at younger and younger ages isn't helpful. Some events aren't meant for girls so young." she commented.

I'm swaying on this topic. I might agree with her, because I took my older daughter to a few of these innocent Daddy/Daughter dances when she was little. Although we had a blast and they played lots of kid music and had games that little girls that she's in middle school she scorns the idea of going.

"That's for little kids, Dad. I'm too old for that."

Wow. So the very thing I tried to use to prepare her for a real date, has now become a joke. I wonder, will she now look at chivalry like she's being treated like a child? The thing she was supposed to look forward to--has it now become something to be avoided? Something for children?

Has society's bent to celebrate mediocrity ruined it for us? After all, we have graduation ceremonies for 6 graders, even those leaving Kindergarten. And we give blue ribbons for "participating" and now ....dances for little girls.

Perhaps we need to go back to simpler remedies for quality time. Reading together, playing hide and seek, family dinners and bedtime prayers. Perhaps providing such an extravagant event is conditioning our girls to get bored with the magic and expect to be further amazed. I pity the poor young man who wants to woo my daughter but can never live up to what Daddy has already given her....magical evenings, Disney cruises, trips to Europe, etc. etc.

I've never done such extravagant things, but I'm still as guilty as they come. And the pressure to provide "more" is ruthless where I live, in the family entertainment capital of the world.

What do you think? Is a Daddy/Daughter dance really all we think it is? Is it really a special time to connect with your little girl? Will it forever be etched in her mind as a Hallmark moment representing your love for her...or are we shooting ourselves in the foot? Tell us what you think.